Currently singing: Zephyr Song, RHCP
I am supposed to be studying, unfortunately however, I cannot pull all my will and want together in order to bring myself to do so. I find myself dwelling upon thoughts that had been craftily wrapped in a muslin cloth and buried underneath all the other concerns that stand to be of higher importance to my life. Distractions, I tell you. For one thing, I keep mulling over what I would plan to pursue in the coming years of my life--whether I should deviate from the mainstream and completely push myself into media (a subject I've had my eyes on for quite sometime), or whether I should probably take up a course abroad on dance and theatre.
I've always found my life gravitating towards the creative field. My mind is imaginative, I love movement--facial and bodily expressions, and since childhood I have had the inborn inclination to write and express. However, as honest and surprising as this may sound, even if I do take up English at a post-graduation level, where will I go with it? I do not see myself becoming an English professor, standing in front of a large army of moronic teenagers and trying to work with them. Even the mere imagination of such a situation seems humourous. I for one, cannot be strict--and though I am aware that there are teachers who are not strict and are still capable of teaching, it is something I cannot fashion myself into doing.
Moreover, a three years course in English Literature has taught me that though I love the subject, I absolutely cannot learn the texts, quotes and what have you not--it's simply unacceptable by my character and my intellect dissuades me from enjoying such liberties.
So the question thus proposed is, what next? Though I do continue to ponder on such matters, I am also conscious of my responsibilties towards my immediate present: studies. I must therefore, do nothing whatsoever in order to disrupt my concentration.
Must. study. Must.